Hi I'm Jenny and I draw and other stuff
"and isn’t that some kind of cursed comfort, a blessed suffering of human perspective?"
Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and the unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind. These passions, like great winds, have blown me hither and thither, in a wayward course, over a deep ocean of anguish, reaching to the very verge of despair.
I have sought love, first, because it brings ecstasy—ecstasy so great that I would often have sacrificed all the rest of life for a few hours of this joy. I have sought it, next, because it relieves loneliness—that terrible loneliness in which one’s shivering consciousness looks over the rim of the world into the cold unfathomable lifeless abyss. I have sought it, finally, because in the union of love I have seen, in a mystic miniature, the prefiguring vision of the heaven that saints and poets have imagined. This is what I sought, and though it might seem too good for human life, this is what—at last—I have found.
With equal passion I have sought knowledge. I have wished to understand the hearts of men. I have wished to know why the stars shine. And I have tried to apprehend the Pythagorean power by which number holds sway above the flux. A little of this, but not much, I have achieved.
Love and knowledge, so far as they were possible, led upward toward the heavens. But always pity brought me back to earth. Echoes of cries of pain reverberate in my heart. Children in famine, victims tortured by oppressors, helpless old people a hated burden to their sons, and the whole world of loneliness, poverty, and pain make a mockery of what human life should be. I long to alleviate the evil, but I cannot, and I too suffer.
This has been my life. I have found it worth living, and would gladly live it again if the chance were offered me.Bertrand Russell, 25 July 1956
Anonymous said: DUDE DAISO'S AMAZING. ALSO, CAN U RECOMMEND ANY DECENT WATERCOLOR BRUSHES? THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! YOU ARE THE COOLEST OF COOL BEANS.
I USE WINSOR NEWTON COTMAN BRUSHES (sizes 4 6 10?) which are student-grade and I think fairly priced for the quality and cheapass Daiso brushes (winks)
Anonymous said: What are your primary art supplies? Ps I really really love you as a person
ALRIGHTEY BUDS THIS IS EVERYTHING
Sakura/Artist’s Loft Micron Pens 005-08, Pentel Brush Pen, graphite pencils ranging from 4H-9B (a lot of different brands bc I have wonderful friends who gift me bunches of pencils), generic old mechanical pencils that you can find on the floors of libraries, General’s charcoal pencil/stick
paper: generic printer paper, cardstock paper, Strathmore drawing/bristol/watercolor paper
I use Adobe Photoshop CC (torrented somewhere), GIMP (free and is p much like Photoshop minus a few trivial perks)
Very recently one of my goodest friends and greatest people I know Emilie gave me her old Wacom Bamboo CTL460 tablet and I’ve been meddling around with digital color flats with that using above programs
PS I also really really love you as a person *affectionate head-to-shoulder bump
one time I blew off everything and drove down to the beach and sat alone in the rain like a loser
that’s all really
I just wanted to smudge a lot
Anonymous said: My friends and I shirked our homework tonight to scroll through your blog and look at your artwork. Now it's nearly midnight and we don't even care that we have lecture in the morning. You're amazing.
I’M SO IN LOVE WITH THIS MESSAGE, CORRUPTING THE YOUTH AND ALL
Growing up is Dumb is an ecliptic fest of DIY bands from around the country, but highlighting the Southern California scene. Aaron Kovacs from Lauren Records put on the fest for it’s second year.
Headliners for me this year were Spraynard, and Elvis Depressedly but many other amazing bands played including Shinobu, Alex G, Old Gray, Dikembe, Hemingway, Aaron’s band Winter Break, Joyce Manor, Roman Candles, Merry Christmas and Calculator to name a few. I came down from Portland to see all my friends and watch my favorite bands.
At Growing Up Is Dumb Vol. 1 last summer I had probably the best memories of the year. Vol 2 did not disappoint. Thank you to everyone involved especially Aaron for putting it together.
ah this is a cool thing by a cool dude
I’ve been working on this comic for awhile now as aforementioned way back when, and it’s been a bittersweet process, with the entire weight of its meaning glaring back every time I worked on it.
I hope you guys read/enjoy. I’m so glad and nervous as heck Chris and I can share this with you all now.
school started hah
"it’s quieter out here"
Anonymous said: what about Gaza and Ferguson John? do they not deserve your respect? you're such a hypocrite, i's disgusting
I think this is a deeply flawed way of looking at the world.
Now, I have talked about Ferguson, and I’ve talked about Gaza. (In fact, I’ve been writing and talking about Israel and Palestine for more than a decade.) But there are many important problems facing the world that I haven’t talked about: I haven’t talked much about the civil war in South Sudan, or the epidemic of suicide among American military personnel, or the persecution of Muslim Rohingya people in Myanmar.
Is that okay? Is it okay for me to talk about, say, racism in football and lowering infant mortality in Ethiopia? Or must we all agree to discuss only whatever is currently the ascendant news story? Is it disrespectful to Ferguson protesters to talk about continued political oppression in Egypt now that we are no longer reblogging images of the protests in Tahrir Square? I think this is a false choice: If you are talking about Ferguson and I am talking about Ethiopian health care, neither of us is hurting the other.
I think the challenge for activists and philanthropists online is in paying sustained attention, not over days or weeks but over years and decades. And I worry that when we turn our attention constantly from one outrage to another we end up not investing the time and work to facilitate actual change. We say “THE WORLD IS WATCHING,” and it is…until it isn’t. We’ve seen this again and again in Gaza and the West Bank. We’re seeing it in Iran. We’re seeing it in South Sudan. And we’re seeing it in the U.S., from net neutrality to Katrina recovery.
The truth is, these problems are complicated, and when the outrage passes we’re left with big and tangled and nuanced problems. I feel that too often that’s when we stop paying attention, because it gets really hard and there’s always a shiny new problem somewhere else that’s merely outrageous. I hope you’re paying attention to Ferguson in five years, anon, and I hope I am, too. I also hope I’m paying attention to child death in Ethiopia. I don’t think these things are mutually exclusive.
I really don’t want to minimize the effectiveness of online activism, because I know that it works: To use a personal example, I’ve learned a TON from the LGBT+ and sexual assault survivor communities in recent years online. People on tumblr make fun of me for apologizing all the time, but I apologize all the time because I am learning all the time, and every day I’m like, “Oh, man, Current Me has realized that Previous Me was so wrong about this!”
But we can only learn when we can listen. And when you call me a hypocrite for talking about X instead of talking about Y, it makes it really hard to listen.
At times, online discourse to me feels like we just sit in a circle screaming at each other until people get their feelings hurt and withdraw from the conversation, which leaves us with ever-smaller echo chambers, until finally we’re left only with those who entirely agree with us. I don’t think that’s how the overall worldwide level of suck gets decreased.
I might be wrong, of course. I often am. But I think we have to find ways to embrace nuance and complexity online. It’s hard—very, very hard—to make the most generous, most accepting, most forgiving assumptions about others. But I also really do think it’s the best way forward.
‘Am I Next?’: Ferguson’s Protests Through the Eyes of a Teenager
I’m trying hard to find the balance between being able to romanticize the shit out of life and allowing my heart to feel and create and glow without putting limits to myself (with art, finance, and everything) and being able criticize myself and the world- to see and acknowledge ugliness, self-absorption, deception, injustice, stigma, misunderstanding, and ignorance, to know their source within and outside me (emotionally, socially, politically)
a lack of mental reconciliation makes it easy to mute it all down, to swallow your barely chewed food and wipe your mouth silently
the world is brutal and disturbing, with recent events and global events that continue to happen in mind, but god, look at that beautiful summer evening sky, the way those clouds waltz among the pale purple expanse.
a lot of times I can’t bring myself to simply do things without some kind of guilt or nausea attached to it- how can I even attempt to facilitate in an already torn world? Is this just a pretense in pursuit and living? Everything’s preset in system, and it aims to bruise us into passive comatose. It gets kind of messed up in my head, it kills me dude
It took so much effort, energy, and time to persuade my parents to pursue art and there’s still so much doubt and arguing, on both ends.
They ask what the point is, often, and most of the time I don’t have a satisfactory answer, for them and myself especially
My parents moved from Hong Kong to the U.S. in 1989. I’m still not sure what expectations they specifically had. Something different, something bigger. A place where acres of space breathe a cheapened virginity. My dad misses Hong Kong, you can hear it in his sighs, and my mom’s mental health has been worsening ever since. I feel obligated to compensate for something I guess.
I want to do this life thing right, but who has any control over that
I’m terrified of failure and mediocrity, and it can be the most productive fuel or the most crippling handicap, always acting in extremes
I hate thinking if I don’t capitalize on what assets I have now then I’m wasting my time- it’s a venomous mindset
I want to be so much more than enough, for myself and the world, and maybe that’s some subconscious ego and self-satisfaction speaking but
this is what I can do, right now. this is what I feel I can be my best doing.
I’m lucky to be here where I am, wiggling around my own definition of being human functioning in the life context I was served. I’m more fortunate than most. I’m going to keep trying, we’ve got to, inhaling and exhaling beauty and tragedy
the world can always be a better place, and caring for ourselves and others and attempting to improve each other’s circumstances in even the smallest waves is so important. This place is incinerating, burning before our eyes, and we are granted with both water and wood. The means in which we feed the fire is determined by us.
This is nothing noble or brave, these circumstances are my raw materials and I will use them the best I can while I can still afford to. You too.
Anonymous said: I feel so useless sitting here. What can I do to help Ferguson??
national moment of silence 2014 (for victims of police brutality)
share the following:
Ferguson Police Department
Email (taken off the site)
222 S. Florissant Road
Ferguson, MO 63135
Jackson, Thomas Police Chief - email@example.com (314) 524-5269
Henke, Rick Captain - firstname.lastname@example.org (314) 524-5272
McBride, Dennis Captain - email@example.com (314) 522-3100
DeCarli, Dan Captain - firstname.lastname@example.org (314) 522-3811
Nabzdyk, Ray Lieutenant - email@example.com (314) 524-5277
Zoll, Timothy Business Liaison Officer/ Neighborhood Watch - firstname.lastname@example.org (314) 522-3100 (x.5533 or 5108)
"I will not let this terrible numbness engulf me"